Sleeping was not an option; it cost too much.
After all, who could resist our savory steakburger or
delicious hand-dipped milkshake?
Because metrics are proxies for performance,
managing by a single metric causes the tail to wag the dog.
Using just one metric is akin to taking a picture of a two-ton elephant.
Nineteen thousand five hundred shareholders
each handing out two certificates for a free milkshake,
which we know possesses addictive power, will bring in
repeat, nay, profitable repeat business.
Of course, you will need to form your own views
on whether you are comfortable with our idiosyncrasies.
Found poetry from the SEC Edgar Filings. Crafted by Christopher Hitt.